Category: Jack Bauer

Every time the cops get an APB to arrest Jack Bauer, half the department mysteriously calls out sick. The fire department too, just in case.

When Russell Crowe threw a phone at that guy, Jack Bauer was on the other side of the line.

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.

After torturing Copernicus, Jack Bauer got him to admit that the solar system revolved not around the Sun, but around his gigantic balls.

If you break one of Jack Bauer’s ribs, he’ll just use it to stab you to death.