Category: Jack Bauer

Jack Bauer has never pressed the Play button on his answering machine. Upon hearing beeps, he tortures the device until it gives up the messages.

When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.

When God said, “Let there be light,” it was so Jack Bauer could see who he was going to shoot.

Everytime Jack Bauer yells “NOW!” at the end of a sentence, a terrorist dies.

You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.