Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.
All of the gold in Fort Knox is fake…
All of the gold in Fort Knox is fake. The U.S.’s actual treasury is chains worn by Mr. T around his neck.
It took five women…
It took five women 2 years to give birth to Mr. T.
Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods…
Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.
Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network…
Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain.