Chuck Norris’ Forecast: Cloudy with a 90% chance of Pain.
Chuck Norris doesn’t take showers. He takes blood baths.
Shares of Chuck Norris (KICK) have risen dramatically in recent weeks, and closed yesterday at it’s 5-year high of 50 roundhouse kicks to the face.
Steven Hawkings was the only man to outsmart Chuck Norris, he got what he deserved.
The only child ever to survive a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris was Gary Coleman. He has not grown since.
Chuck Norris knows the secret to world peace, He just thinks its more fun to kill people
When someone sneezes, God says Chuck Bless you.
150,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris related accidents every year.
Chuck Norris kills 14 white people at the end of every week just to prove he isn’t racist.